I love to use the iceberg metaphor with my clients and their parents. The largest part of the iceberg is the part you can’t see. Behind every child’s behavior is underlying “stuff:” feelings/emotions, interests/needs/desires, self-perceptions, hidden expectations, or unresolved issues from the past. Metaphors can be very powerful in counseling, as they help us understand better than with words alone. I favor the iceberg metaphor because it can be very engaging as it encourages self-exploration.